No Password Required

There was an incident this morning involving my eyebrows. When it was happening, I was thinking, 'this is what my much starved readership needs to hear about...this is a perfect time to reactivate my blog'! And so I logged on...Logging on prompted the entry that you are about to read instead. I have about 412 opportunities in any given day to enter a password. I have passwords for banking, Facebook, email, wireless, MSN, my computer, my laptop, my cellphone, my Blockbuster account has one for God's sake! I can't even rent Pineapple Express without relaying my "top secret' codeword to the pimple-faced little weasel behind the desk at Blockbuster! On top of the myriad of passwords that either have to be numeric, letters (what is the opposite of numeric?), start or end with a capitol letter or some staggeringly annoying combination of the two, now there are these weird little puzzles that you have to decipher and retype in regular letters!! And quite frankly, they make me very nervous. I can't decipher them. The letters are all squished together...is that an L or an I or a 1?! ARGH!!! Now I have never, ever, boasted myself to be a computer-savvy person. My answer to every and all computer issues is to 'turn it off, wait ten seconds and turn it back on again' (which incidentally works more often than not), but I really, really, do not see the need for all these passwords and squishy-puzzle phrases. If some poor, pathetic sod had nothing better to do with their time but to crack the code to get into my laptop (I'll give you a clue, it's a four letter word embossed into the front and inside of my computer), maneuver the maze of prompts and icons to enable my wireless settings, crack that code (not a tricky one for anyone who knows me or has ten seconds to look around my kitchen which is where my LT lives most of the time) then find the Blogger page, repeat steps one through three again because by now Vista would have crashed and would have to start the whole bloody process over again) and so on and so on...would the task of having to retype that squishy letter/number sequence really stop them? If you are such a person and can be bothered to devote this much time to screwing with my life, please at least make it more interesting. Make me a size 4. Make my bra a size D. Make my postal code 90210 and give me a chalet in the Alps. Rack up my credit cards with cool stuff like Fleuvogs and iTunes downloads of cool music that I woudl never have heard of. After that, go nuts with the blog entries and the Facebooking... I'm pretty sure no on reads those anyways.